Labor and Delivery – a tale of two births

HARPER

In 2020 we found out we were pregnant with our first child due in April of 2021. Honestly not a terrible time to be pregnant in my opinion. No one touched you – no one was around and really at the hospital were they going to tell a pregnant woman she had to keep her mask on? No. And I didn’t.

I like looking back and think about the day I gave birth to both of our kids which my pre – birth self would have thought I was lying. I still don’t want to watch anyone give birth (ever) and I get the hebegebees about most stuff but this blog post is more for me to remember so years later when Harper asks, I can say YES I remember that day well.

So on April 14th at 10pm I got out of bed to go pee for the umpteenth time which is standard in pregnancy butttt when I stood up, my water broke. Apparently that only happens in 10% of births that the first sign is water breaking. Up until that point I had never had a braxton hick contraction, no false labor nothing other than really low pressure on my pelvis (walking hurt soooo bad and my midwife was like well ya, her head is right there!). I think being active really helped. I swam almost 3xs a week and still worked out and walked a ton (a luxury I didn’t have round 2). I only gained 28 lbs in that pregnancy too.

Anyway back to the order of events.

Water broke at 10pm – I went and took a warm bath because my adrenaline spiked and I couldn’t keep my body from shaking uncontrollably. I debated whether to tell Ricky immediately or let him get some rest. I think I told him about 11pm. I labored at home, took another warm bath until 3am when I told Ricky – ummmm I think we need to get to the hospital. Contractions were getting closer and starting to be really painful (my strep b test was negative which is why once my water broke I didn’t have to come in right away).

We left at 4am and to be honest I wanted to leave right at 3 when I said it was time to leave! HAHAH that hour of waiting was making me annoyed. We got to the hospital around 4:30 and I got in and started the paperwork immediately. Because I wanted an epidural they had to pump me with fluids for an hour (didn’t know that was part of the epidural – didn’t like all the fluids – blew me up like a balloon).

I got the epidural at 7am and I as 4 cm dilated. That was honestly the best thing though for that birth because I hadn’t slept all night – I was exhausted from the pain of contractions and now I would have to deliver a baby? I remember the epidural taking effect and just passing out and sleeping for 45 mins. I put a facemask on and just need that.

At 10am they checked me again and I was fully dilated so they called the midwife over who apparently didn’t believe I progressed that fast. She was not in the hospital so had to drive over and she got there about 11:30ish.

Apparently I was fully dilated and so we started pushing around 11:45 and by 12:15pm Harper was born! I only pushed for about a half hour – I had a small tear towards the urethra which IMO is better than the other way. I think I had one stitch.

CALEB

So to contrast with Caleb, we were juuusssttt going to start to try for a second kiddo and honestly it took us about 9 months to get pregnant with Harper and I just assumed it would be the same. Nope. I swear I have no idea how we got pregnant because I had just started tracking my “ovulation” again and I was SHOCKED when I found out we were pregnant. Like pretty sure we didn’t try around the right time so I’m still very confused.

Caleb was due January 5th and about a week prior to his birth at about 5am I was having contractions but they weren’t painful they were just braxton hicks but I hadn’t experienced those until about 38/39 weeks pregnant. I had these for about 4 hours that morning and wasn’t sure if that was the day or not. They went away but on the morning on January 4th I had the same thing. Braxton Hicks contractions that would come and go – nothing consistent and nothing I couldn’t work through. Ironically looking back the day before I had a checkup and I had told them I really hadn’t been feeling him move all that much so they did a stress test and she told me I was having contractions through the stress test. I said ya they’ve been like that pretty on and off now.

SO BACK TO JANUARY 4th.

We decided to take Harper to the farmparks because it was a relatively nice day and I just was savoring my last moments with just her being my only baby to have to take care of outside the womb. I’m glad I asked my mom to come because the contractions really never stopped – but also I wouldn’t say they were getting worse. It was weird.

By the time we got home and put Harper down for her nap I remember at 2pm when she was getting up thinking – okay these may be getting stronger. I started timing them and they seemed to be all over the place, I just knew false labor was a thing and didn’t want to get a babysitter, drive to the hospital just to be told it wasn’t. So we waited longer. I called the midwife and she said to just keep track but if I wanted to come in then to come in.

I texted my mom around 5 saying ya this is labor and if she could come after design team at church. My mom got to our house around 6:45pm and we were out the door by 7pm. Honestly – that was silly of me, I should have just said to come over but the contractions got so much stronger at the end.

We got to Hillcrest at 7:30pm – parked and walked the lonnngggg hallway to labor and delivery. We had to WAIT FOR A ROOM for a half hour! I couldn’t sit. We got back to where they access you around 8pm and I didn’t know there was a room before your labor room and they had us in this small space and Ricky and I looked at each other and thought – wait is this where I’m delivering?! I guess that’s what happens when you don’t take the hospital tour.

Anywayyyy we get back to a room eventually I have no idea what time but my water still hadn’t broken yet. I was still under the impression I wanted an epidural but she came in and said well you’re 8cm dilated…. you can wait another hour / hour and a half for the whole process of the epidural and you miiiggghhhttt end up delivery naturally anyway – or we can go back, break your water and you’ll deliver in a half hour.

I was like what in the world do I do! I really didn’t want the intense contraction pain I was having for another hour and a half and thought, I can last a half hour, I can do it.

So I said let’s go natural. Ricky pooped a brick. HAHA. I think he was just as nervous as I was like, like what are we about to experience.

So we get back there and they are trying to get all the details and I wanted to stand for bit because it was more comfortable then sitting. They did have to have me sit to break my water and then I wanted to kneel but as soon as she broke my water and they tried to get me into the position I wanted, I was like ya no that’s not happening, he’s coming I HAVE TO PUSH.

It’s like a weird reflex that you can’t control. Best way I can describe is to say it’s the need to throw up and you can’t hold it down. I pushed for 8 minutes, 3xs and Caleb was born at 9:58pm weighing 8lbs 12ounces and 21.6 inches long.

Looking back

A few things stand out looking back – working out helps immensely and I wish I was more active the second time around. I’m thankful for friends like Liz who told me she went natural unplanned sort of like me and then told me, if that ever happens to you, know you can do it! That’s what I told myself in the moments I had to decide what to do with Caleb. I really loved that after Caleb was born I could get up and walk around and move and feel all my limbs and wasn’t plumbed up with fluid. Also, pregnancy symptoms are all different for each pregnancy so don’t dread something because it might not happen the second time. And most importantly, get the hospital quicker if we have a third baby because that baby might be born in the car otherwise!